The adult is always responsible

8-20-2013 Colorado:

As program manager at Safe Passage, the Children's Advocacy Center for the Pikes Peak Region, I felt compelled to write this letter in response to some of the comments left on local news websites in response to reports posted on two child abuse cases that happened in El Paso County.

In recent weeks there have two cases of child sexual assault reported in the local news, one in which the perpetrator was a male. I use the word perpetrator because according to the news report he was being sentenced and that means it had gone through a court process and he either was found guilty or pled guilty. The second case was one in which the alleged perpetrator was a female. I used "alleged" because the news reports indicate an arrest has been made but no court process has found her guilty.

It was very disheartening to me to see the polar responses of this community. In the case with the male perpetrator, people were leaving comments very supportive of the victims. In the case with the female suspect, people were accusing the victim of lying or making comments about how lucky he was as a young boy if he had sex with an older "reasonably" good-looking female.

I would start by pointing out that there is a natural power differential between adults and children. No matter what happens between an adult and a child, the adult is always responsible. There are female sex offenders in our community. They do not always get identified as such because society has a difficult time believing that the maternal gender would ever do anything that would be harmful to a child. They are often dismissed when they are identified or treated differently than male offenders by the "system". Their abuse is no less harmful to their victims and in some instances can be more traumatic for their victims because society sees their abuse as some kind of right of passage.

A child who discloses abuse is, in my estimation, no less courageous than the young men and women we send to war to defend our country. These children have everything to lose by making a report. These children many times earn the anger of their family, friends, and siblings. I spend many hours in court rooms every month supporting these young victims as they testify in open court in front of the person they are accusing and anyone else who chooses to be in attendance. It always breaks my heart to recognize there are many people in the court room who support the offenders and usually only me and the advocate from the District Attorney's Office there in support of the child victim. Why is this?

Why do we as adults always protect other adults by choosing to believe the child is lying? Why would a child choose to be ridiculed by both people they know and those they do not know by coming forward to hold their abuser accountable?

We have a responsibility to protect the most vulnerable citizens of our society. Will you be the one who will stand up on behalf of an abused child? Learn the signs of abuse. Contact Safe Passage at www.safepassagecac.org or follow us on Facebook. ..Source.. by Tammi Pitzen, Safe Passage, Colorado Springs